I feel like I need to run as fast as I can, head held high, arms bent and pinned to my sides, then maybe blare a little Billy Joel “Uptown Girl” to shake off the Sarah McLachlan concert from last night. Or maybe I shouldn’t shake it off. I don’t know. She’s left me utterly emotional, along with the rest of the audience– I just wasn’t one of them that left in tears.
God, did she really have to make me stop and think so much? And why can’t I cry? I sat forward because I wanted to feel more, damn it. I wanted to freaking cry! I wanted to just be a girl, at a concert, crying if I felt like it. I heard Joy next to me (my date for the night) even sniffling. Come on, just one tear? “I can’t even understand half of the words,” I told her when she commented on some of the lyrics. I guess I should have brushed up on my Sarah before the event–it had been a while since I had listened to her CD. I’m one for mainly feel good music. Too many depressing lyrics can make for a shitty day. I felt like Cameron Diaz in The Holiday when she couldn’t cry–but I am a crier when crying is needed!
Take me to a funeral and I’m the first one shedding a tear, whether I knew the deceased or not. I can’t even speak at funerals; tears just escape me. When anyone sings, I cry. When they read the Eulogy, I cry. If I meet eyes with anyone else in the funeral home, I cry. They are just heart wrenching, and I feel like I’ve already been to one too many. (I try to avoid them like the plague.) So why couldn’t I cry with the other 2200 people in the auditorium? It almost made me feel like a heartless bitch, yet I feel I’m one of the more caring people I know. The more I thought about it though, the not crying thing was a good thing for I had done smoky eyes, and we all know what happens when water meets mascara and dark eyeshadow.
So I moved on, and accepted that my mood was more of an inward meditation. I let the music flow through me, and around me, and I allowed it to resonate deep into my soul. Her back-up singers/guitarist (both female) were “building a mystery” right up on stage with her. When the three of them sang in unison, it made the hairs on the back of Joy’s neck stand up (I don’t have any, lol). But seriously, Melissa McClelland is breaking out her first album this fall and she is one to keep on your radar, her voice is stellar! I can’t even describe it.
I’ve never been to this type of concert where the artists are just so riveting and vocally insane. No ripped half-naked male dancers, no heart dropping out of the sky with a sixteen-year-old (Bieber) on it–just highly incredible talented people making music from the gifts they were given. (I envisioned myself trying to sing and play guitar at the same time; it seems much like patting your head and rubbing your stomach simultaneously but on a much harder level.) I resigned myself to the fact that you are either born with a god-given musical talent…. or not.
I’m not sure there are many other artists out there that can put their words down quite like Sarah can, let alone into vocals. And you don’t just make up those types of lyrics. She’s gone to hell and back (at least it sounds like it)in her personal relationships and she just pours it out onto her piano. I admire her for that and for what she bares to us all. Her voice is still echoing in my bones, and probably will for some time.
I think Joy texted it best after the concert. “Young, old, skinny, fat…at a Sarah McLachlan concert, we’re all one thing. Damaged.” And if you didn’t enter the auditorium damaged, you sure as hell left there feeling a little that way.
Last night was the end of her current tour—and she was better than Ice Cream. If you haven’t heard her live, go next time around. This chic will strum up emotions in you that may have been dormant for a long time. And sometimes we all just really need to feel deeply, passionately, and intensely, but it doesn’t me we have to cry.
“It’s funny how we feel so much… but we cannot say a word,
(Enough of the emotional stuff….I’m putting MJ back on! Dirty Diana…)